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Stuart Matthews Author
  • Home
  • Children's books
  • Works in progress
  • Guest Author Dawn Serbert
  • Guest Author T.J. Hübner
  • Blog
  • My Artwork

T.J. Hübner

I am T.J, a self-published poet, from the United Kingdom. I never thought of myself as a creative or artistic person, just a regular nine to five worker which changed dramatically.


In 2013 I decided along with my father who was in the early stages of dementia that I would become his full time caregiver taking on the day to day responsibilities with household chores, medication, finances etc. which dad was struggling to remember to do. After a year of caring 24/7, we slowly became isolated within our own little two person world and I started to feel trapped and alone, so I made a decision that I needed to find a hobby or creative outlet to aid with my own and my father’s mental wellbeing. In April 2014, I joined a small writing group where I learnt about how to write and perform my own poetry which really helped me at a time when I wasn’t sure of myself.

TJ can be found on Twitter here or push the "MY WEBSITE" button to go to his website

MY WEBSITE

TJ's books

Book 1

Book 1

Book 1

Selected poem


Standing Before

 

The man I saw before me was a mystery

Even though we had a long history

Standing before this wooden symbol

I feel as small as a thimble

With the question of what we call life

That with it brings great strife

Never knowing when the end is nigh

As we gaze upon God’s almighty sky

Mourning those, for who it is their time

Death’s clock does its final chime

We come together to pay our respect

Chattering among us, we will reflect

Upon a loved one’s mortal soul

As we make their life cycle whole

From birth to death we know the answer

That we will all become a cloud dancer

But today as we gather to honour you father

You created your own story in life like an author

Son, soldier, engineer, husband, parent and friend

Nearly ninety years of life you did blend

Unfortunately at the end your will was taken

By a disease that leaves the body forsaken

I am thankful, for today you start your eternal life

Hand in hand with your beloved wife

Please keep each other safe, till my time is done

And we are a family again, father, mother and son

So I stand here before you to rejoice and celebrate

Not for your death, for your life I commemorate

With love I see you on your journey

As you join God’s celestial army




Reviews


 

5.0 out of 5 stars

“Asking questions of myself, subconsciously That I would never dare say aloud, consciously”


Sincere insight into the life of caring for a loved one with dementia; the highs and the lows. It takes patience and perseverance. And when those two things run out, you dig deep and do it anyway. The author knows the score and reminds us to always, “Look, Listen, Learn.”


 

5.0 out of 5 stars

Reads like poetry for the soul


This book was written with such care and empathy that the love and understanding for their parent touches you. But it takes you through challenges of life many human beings live with. Whether we've become a caretaker to a child that's fallen ill, an elderly parent, or our spouse, there are Pearls of Wisdom to gleam from these pages. The poetry is potent but gives any reader the knowledge and encouragement needed to carry with them for the rest of their days.

The three L's: Look, Listen, Learn prove to be of great value when caretaking, as the author tells us in their epilogue. I also appreciate this from my firsthand experiences. I look forward to more poetry from TJ Hubner. Your Mortality is No More, Vulnerability, Insomnia, and Alone are a few favorites for me, from this collection!

Book 2

Book 1

Book 1

Selected poem


Carer and Protector


I remember how he was so frail

Slim, jaundice looking and pale

The affliction of illness taking its toll

His own life, no longer in his control

Unable to look after himself anymore

Seeing him that way made my heart sore


To him I was son, carer and protector

To me he was father, patient and objector

For seven years, I was his true helper

Holding my tongue and my temper

Doing whatever was required to care

All the time reminding myself to be aware


As time went on I lost the father I knew

Each day brought changes as a preview

To show how cruel dementia really is

Making life for us both a never-ending quiz 

Will he, wont he remember me was the question

That came with his memory regression


Dementia took the father I cherished

One slow day by one slow day he perished

Losing all sense of time and reality

In the end recognising nobody

Left to resonate in his own world

Which created a type of dreamworld


Along with memory deterioration

Came significant physical transformation

He struggled with everyday functions

Leading to bodily malfunctions

With a look of helplessness in his eyes

Affecting me to the point of hidden cries


Life became upside down and twisted

As my parent needed to be assisted

Bringing a parental child role reversal

Where care was for love not commercial

Aiding my loved one in a time of need 

Making sure their welfare was guaranteed 


As the carer and protector for the afflicted

I needed to understand what was predicted

From an illness that still has no cure

My basic role would be to reassure

Watch over him and look for signs

Making sure I learned the guidelines


Being a carer was a great responsibility

Looking after a person with a disability

Learning how to live with individuality

Coping with the stress of emotionality

Being strong for a loved one in distress

A strategic game of human chess


That game of chess has now ended

The grief I feel, not comprehended

I know the end comes to us all

The fact of life that will befall

Thinking of the loss brings on a tear

With the future ahead is unclear




Reviews



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Available as

paperback - £6.99

e-book - £2.40 

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Available as

paperback - £6.97

e-book - £3.67

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